Jesus as the Bridegroom, Astonishing New Perspective

Have you ever thought about Jesus as your Bridegroom? Jewish wedding customs have long been recognized as a pattern of Christ’s redemption. , Learning about Jewish traditions caused me to reconsider my relationship with Christ. Do I love Him for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, for better or worse? These are things I agreed to when I married my husband, John. Do I make the same commitments to Christ?

I discovered some things about ancient Jewish weddings that changed how I look at Jesus.

The Betrothal of the Bridegroom (Kiddushin)

The brothel in ancient times was more like what we today consider a wedding. It usually took place in the fall, after the harvest was over. It included a written marriage contract called a Ketubah that could only be dissolved by death or a written divorce.

See the Betrothal of Jesus for more information.

Preparation for the Marriage of to the Bridegroom

The actual wedding took place a year after the betrothal. During that time, the groom returned to his Father’s house and prepared a place for his Bride in his Father’s house.

In my Father’s house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place. (John 14:2)

As women, we spend many hours dreaming of our wedding day. In ancient Israel, the Bride was busy. In the year following her betrothal, she spent many hours sewing a beautiful white wedding gown and veil. She also weaved linens for her new home.

The most important thing the Bride made was a white sash, about 18 inches wide and 6 feet long. The sash was embroidered with special symbols personal to her or her family.

Now, she just had to wait.

The Wedding Parade

When the groom’s Father thought the groom’s preparations were complete, the groom gathered his male friends. They began a precession to the Bride’s house with trumpets (shofars) and loud shouts accompanied by music and dancing to warn the Bride the groom was coming (Rosh Hashanah, Day of trumpets). The colorful parade usually took place at night, with everyone carrying lamps.

The groom’s best friend usually leads the parade. John the Baptist prepared the way for the Bridegroom.

As it is written in the prophets, Behold, I send my messenger before thy face, which shall prepare thy way before thee. The voice of one crying in the wilderness, Prepare ye the way of the Lord, make his paths straight. (Mark 1:2-3)

The Bride had been waiting with her maidens for the sound of the trumpets, not knowing exactly when her Bridegroom would come. Now, the Bride and her maidens light their lamps and go out to meet the Bridegroom.

Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. (James 4:8)

Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened unto ten virgins, which took their lamps and went forth to meet the Bridegroom. (Mathew 25:1)

Often, both the Bride and Bridegroom wore crowns during the ceremony.

Formal Marriage of the Bridegroom (Nissuin)

When they reached the Bridegroom’s house, there was a formal ceremony. The Bride and groom held right hands, and the white sash she embroidered was wrapped around their hands as the priest pronounced the marriage covenant. Sometimes the sash was wrapped around the couple.

Two cups of wine were offered to the couple. The first cup they shared. In Eastern culture, two people drinking from the same cup indicates intimacy in the relationship. The second cup had bitter herbs added. The Bridegroom took the bitter cup and drank all of it so his Bride did not have to.

And he went a little further and fell on his face, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt (Mathew 26:39)

Jesus drank the bitter cup, drained it to the bottom, and tasted the bitter dregs. The bitter cup represents God’s wrath.

The Bride and Bridegroom Consummate the Marriage

Next, the couple retired to the wedding chamber to consummate the marriage. The white sash was laid under the Bride. If she were a virgin, there would be blood on the sash.

If the Bride proved not to be a virgin, the Bridegroom had a choice. He could show the sash, with no blood, to his Father, and the Bride would be stoned as an adulteress because the penalty for adultery was death. Or he could spill some of his blood and place it on the sash to save his Bride.

How much more shall the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself without spot to God, purge your conscience from dead works to serve the living God? (Hebrews 9:14)

We are the Bride, and Jesus spilled his blood to save us from eternal death.

Conclusion

I used to think of Christ as my King sitting on a throne and not very approachable. Understanding Jesus as my Bridegroom makes me think of Him in a more personal relationship.

Not just a King but a Friend I can talk to and share the intimate details of my life with.

For over 50 years, I shared everything with my husband, John. We made decisions together, grew together, and learned from each other. In good times and bad, we were there for each other.

I want to cultivate that kind of deep, meaningful connection with Jesus. Please share your thoughts in the comments.